Someone Who Deserves Me

Listen, boss.

She's so beautiful.
Her confidence, her smile.
She isn't perfect, no but her faults, those I adore.
She's knows these great movies. No, films. Films. She talks as if she dines with the characters on a daily basis.
I saw her once, at a store, she was dancing. There wasn't any fear of mockery. She was dancing. I loved it.
Her smile, I know, I know, I mentioned it before, but there is something so comforting about it. It's real. There have been tragic moments in her life before that make those muscles hold up so much more elegantly.
I took out. For a walk, a stroll if you must.
She loves nature. She'll cry, no weep when she hears something beautiful, when a living creature flutters and demands appreciation. She was walking. Stopped mid trot, she trots you know. She stopped, turned, pointed.
It isn't naivety, no it's youth. I adore it. She finds the flaws and the beauty in everything. I love it.
I bought her a present. Some every day movie memorabilia. You can find it anywhere. Guess what, she did this happy stomp. I love it. She loved it.

Listen, boss, I know, she has my attention and adoration.
But you know what, I'm no shmuck, she deserves it all.
Who, of all these people on Earth, all these strangers, deserves my love more than her?
She's me.

Of all the people in the world, why can't I love myself.
It took me long enough, boss. It really did.
But I'm amazing, time I realized that. I deserve to be treated with respect, love. I deserve to care for myself, I should.
Me. Me.
Why not?

Have Patience

There is so much noise, and the headaches, they don't end.
These thoughts, all these connections are strung together and rerouted in seconds.
There are aspects, which are overlooked and trivial but no matter how trivial they hold importance.

It's a train. At each stop yes, people get off but several board.
And the noise.
So many voices, beautiful thoughts, each admiring and questioning something new, some worries, some beauty, it's marvelous but this train is not big enough.
This train can't hold it in. There are too many.
Mostly, the passengers get along. The train can withstand the noise, the complaints, the emotion, but sometimes, sometimes, it has to stop, it has to BREAK.
This train can't always move.

It is a train. There are pieces, compartments if you must that make this elegant train but sometimes it can't function as well, as promptly as its usual self. Sometimes. Sometimes, it can't.

Don't laugh.
It is aware of how bizarre it can be. It accepts this but during rush hour, any worry is a worthy one.
Don't laugh, just hold on, relax, don't make any of the passengers louder, don't make them worry.
Relax.

Have patience.

Who can see me?
Losing personal relationships like people do they house keys.