A Free Ride

Spinning in place.
That's how it feels, except after the movement ends, the brain continues to turn. 
360‎°. Faster, faster, faster.
Slow. Enough to catch a breath then again. Fast.
There isn't an image in focus. That's why it's worse.
All these sounds and objects being processed at once. 
Differentiate, please. 
The blurs become hideous visions akin to nightmares. 
Perhaps it is the centripetal force, but there is a new breath on my neck.
Gentle prickles from imaginary places.
Is this real? Yes. All the spins.
+the nightmares
Spin more. 

My Little Dreams

I'm folding up my little dreams

Within my heart to-night,

And praying I may soon forget

The torture of their sight

For Time's deft fingers scroll my brow

With fell relenteless art-

I'm folding up my little dreams

To-night, within my heart!

   -Georgia Douglas Johnson 

A Rainbow

My lips had grown accustomed to Nothing. Nothing could be rough, forceful, unsatisfying, crisp, abrupt, inconsistent.
My lips knew Absence. For months Absence had gifted impulsivity and quick release.
See, a body and mind can learn to survive.
Easily.
Mine coped. It survived.
I had Nothing and Absence.
Then something beautiful happened.
My lips were gifted Love.
Love was warm. Love was perfectly synchronized to match my movements.
Love brought gifts of tears and butterflies. Love embraced me with unwavering emotion and positivity.
Love was short.
See, at that precise moment, I was alive again.
I was reminded why I was unhappy with Nothing and Absence and it all happened because of a kiss.

The Reality of Loss

It was easy to hold your hand.
Even during the storm, after hesitation, it was easy to hold on.
A brief flicker of doubt followed quickly by understanding and love.

It was easy to love you.
Each day my heart grew fonder of the kind, nurturing, patient, whimisical person you are.
While the winds grew stronger and the rain became shards of glass, I held on.
While the light of my future dimmed, I found solace in the shine of your smile.

It was easy to stay.
Losing friends and relatives hurt. The blood loss wanned on me.
Even then I held strong knowing losing you would be total decapitation.
Blood may be crimson but nothing is as sweet as the tender embrace that was gifted to me each night.

In the end, it was always easy.